First Among Prequels
by Hawki
Summary: Oneshot: A big fan of 'Star Wars,' Eli was overjoyed to find some movies of the saga onboard 'Destiny.' However, the three movies available didn't exactly rank highly on his list of favorites...


**First Among Prequels**

"You have _what_?"

"You heard me. I have the _Star Wars _trilogy on my laptop.

Eli Wallace couldn't believe his ears. Well, technically that wasn't entirely true. He believed his ears at least-Dale Volker's words got that far at least. However, the sound reaching his brain was another matter and if not for his reliance on his primary sense, it might have never got that far.

"You ok Eli?" Volker asked, looking genuinely puzzled. "You look pale."

_Pale like a kaminoan, _Eli thought to himself, reflecting how those aliens from _Attack of the Clones _were one of the few things he liked about one of Lucas' 'prequel' movies. But deciding that might not be the best answer, he resolved to call upon the will of the Force and answer his fellow scientist directly.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Eli murmured. "Just surprised that's all. I mean, it's not as if we brought anything in the way of entertainment with us from Icarus Base is it?"

Volker didn't answer and technically he didn't have to. The crew of _Destiny _were barely getting by with the limited food and water they had, not to mention dust devils and viruses sabotaging the latter. And while Eli could understand the principle behind Young's orders for the crew to keep in shape, he couldn't help but wonder how effective it would be. After running several miles, one would be hungry and thirsty and tempted to consume more as a result.

"Anyway, why didn't you mention it earlier?" Eli asked, trying to show the same composure of Obi-Wan Kenobi and hide his eagerness. "I mean, _Star Wars _isn't going to contribute to our survival but it'll at least raise morale."

Volker chuckled. "Maybe. For some of us at least. Still, truth be told, it was actually watching the _South Park _episode you'd downloaded that reminded me. I thought I'd deleted the trilogy months ago to save space but when I checked out of curiosity last night, it turned out that the movies had only got as far as the recycle bin.

Now it was Eli's turn to be silent. True, he _could _have poked fun at Volker's lack of organization. Yes, he _could _have pointed out with the benefit of hindsight that he should have downloaded more episodes of _South Park _when he was back on Earth. But right now, basking in the glow of the knowledge that he had access to one of his favourite movies, Eli couldn't say anything. It was as if Volker had become Yoda and as Luke Skywalker, he was obligated to bask in his words of wisdom. Or as Anakin Skywalker in _The Phantom Meance_. Eli certainly felt as useless sometimes, not to mention Chloe being the proverbial Padmé.

"Anyway, just thought I'd mention it," said Eli's fellow aficionado. "You've been a big help to the crew, so it's the least I can do. Feel free to watch any time I'm not using it."

Eli nodded, murmuring his thanks. Perhaps not the most polite of partings, but that was what came from succumbing to the lure of the Dark Side.

"God damn it! That lying son of a bitch!"

To say that Chloe Armstrong was surprised would have been surprised would have been an understatement. True, she didn't know Eli Wallace that well, but the last time she'd heard him swearing was...well, never. And while part of her mind told her that it was none of her business and that she should keep on walking past his quarters, the majority of her mind prompted her to investigate. Because judging from the sound of her friend's voice, either Doctor Rush had rubbed off on him or something was incredibly wrong. Either way, neither option was particularly pleasant.

Sliding under the rising hatch, the daughter of Alan Armstrong was pleased to see that while pacing around the room and clearly agitated, Eli at least hadn't hurt himself. However, his desire to harm another, specifically Dale Volker was clear to see and one that Chloe decided wasn't an outcome she intended on witnessing.

"Um, Eli?" she asked hesitantly. "Are you alright?"

It was a rhetorical question but at least it had the intended effect of making Eli stop pacing around like a caged animal. However, his eyes, usually humorous, still bore resemblance to an animal in captivity.

"Yeah, I'm fine..." Eli murmured, clearly lying. "Just a bit peeved that's all."

"Really? Peeved about what?"

"Volker. He lied to me. Said he had the _Star Wars Trilogy _on his laptop and tricked me into watching it.

Chloe raised an eyebrow, glancing at the laptop on Eli's desk. True, she didn't know much about science fiction and of what she _did _know, she actually preferred _Star Trek_, probably due to her father's government association. Still, the frozen image displaying a pair of figures holding glowing blades certainly seemed to belong to _Star Wars _at least. So what was the problem?

"So...is something wrong with the files?" the senator's daughter asked hesitantly.

"No..." murmured Eli, slumping down on his bed. "The files are fine...unfortunately. It's the content that's the problem."

"Content? But don't you like the _Star Wars Trilogy_?"

Eli sighed, lying still for a few moments. However, when he spoke, the sadness, the frustration in his voice more than made up for the delay.

"I like _Star Wars_," said Eli despondently. "But I hadn't counted on Volker giving me the bloody prequel trilogy."

* * *

_A/N_

_You know, I actually prefer the _Star Wars _prequel trilogy despite watching the original trilogy long beforehand. Still, I can respect the frustrations of Eli and other nerds and fanboys. Now all he has to do is aquaint Rush with fiction besides novels read when faced with incineration._


End file.
